Transitioning to a New Country: Mental Health Tips for Expats

TL;DR

• Moving abroad is exciting but emotionally demanding.
• Culture shock happens in stages — and repeats.
• Expat spouses often face unique identity and community challenges.
• Helpful tips: routines, community, balancing connections.
• Therapy provides steady support through transitions.

Finding Your Feet Abroad
Moving to a new country can feel like standing at the edge of two worlds — the life you left behind and the one you’re about to build. It’s exciting, but it can also feel lonely, uncertain, and exhausting at times. I know this first-hand: I grew up as a Third Culture Kid (TCK), spending my childhood moving between cultures, and later my own children also became TCKs. For the past 15+ years, I’ve also lived overseas as an adult, making me an ATCK – adult third culture kid. Transitioning is never a “one and done” task — it’s an ongoing process of adjusting, re-adjusting, and finding your place.

The Emotional Impact of Relocation
Psychologists note that cultural transitions involve both loss and growth. You leave behind routines, relationships, and familiarity, while stepping into new opportunities and identities (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).
Culture shock is often one of the biggest challenges. It describes what happens when the new culture differs from the familiar one, and is often felt as inadequacy, confusion, isolation, or even failure to adapt (Oberg, 1960, as cited in Jurásek & Wawrosz, 2023; Marx, 2011). Pedersen’s (1994) five-stage model, adapted by Marx (2011), explains the emotional cycle that many expats go through:

1. Honeymoon – everything feels new and exciting.
2. Disintegration – reality sets in, frustrations grow, mood dips.
3. Reintegration – partial recovery, yet culture shock reappears in new ways.
4. Autonomy – greater acceptance, culture shock eases.
5. Interdependence – life feels manageable, mood lifts, and integration feels real.

And for many, there is returning home, where culture shock can strangely kick in again.
This cycle often repeats. No one completely escapes culture shock when adapting to an international move (Jurásek & Wawrosz, 2023).

The Expat Spouse Experience
For the accompanying partner, who is often a woman, moving for their partner’s career, the adjustment can be even more complex. Research shows that many women leave behind their own careers, social networks, and independence, while partners and children enter ready-made communities through work and school (Cohen, 1977; Thompson & Tambyah, 1999, as cited in Arieli, 2007).
Arieli’s (2007) study of expat wives in Beijing revealed that finding community was essential for well-being. Women built support networks and a sense of belonging through collective sisterhood — sharing advice, guidance, and solidarity. While there can be perks such as domestic help, travel, and more leisure, the personal cost of uprooting identity and independence is very real.

Common Challenges Expats Face

1. Loneliness and Isolation
   Leaving behind your natural support systems means you may feel disconnected, even if surrounded by people.
2. Stress of Practical Adjustments
   From navigating visas to finding housing, the “life admin” side of moving can feel relentless.
3. Relationship Strain
   Partners and families abroad can experience different adjustment speeds. Children, especially, may struggle between cultures, just as TCK research has long highlighted (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).

Practical Ways to Support Your Transition

• Build New Routines Quickly
  Small anchors like a morning coffee spot, exercise routine, or weekly market visit give stability when everything else feels uncertain.
• Find Community — Online and Offline
  Expats often thrive when they connect with others in a similar situation, but don’t forget local groups and language classes. Both can help you feel at home.
• Stay Connected, But Balance It
  Keeping ties with loved ones back home is important, but leaning only on old networks can make settling locally harder. Try to strike a balance.​

Supporting Your Mental Health
Relocation stress isn’t a sign of weakness — it’s part of the process. Research shows that support, reflection, and having safe spaces to process experiences can reduce long-term stress for expats (Brown & Holloway, 2008).
That’s where therapy can help. I work with expats worldwide, offering online counselling so you can access consistent support wherever you are. My own background as a TCK, and as someone who has parented TCKs, gives me a personal understanding of the unique mix of excitement and loss in building a life abroad.

Final Thoughts
Transitioning to a new country is more than just unpacking boxes — it’s about re-grounding yourself. It’s normal to feel wobbly at times, but you don’t have to do it alone.
If you’d like to explore support during your transition, you’re welcome to book a free Curiosity Call with me.

References:

• Arieli, D. (2007) 'The Task of Being Content: Expatriate Wives in Beijing, Emotional Work and Patriarchal Bargain.', Journal of International Women' s Studies, 8(4), pp. 18–31 
• Brown, L., & Holloway, I. (2008). The adjustment journey of international postgraduate students: Culture shock and adaptation. Journal of Research inInternational Education, 7(2), 232–249.
• Jurásek, M. and Wawrosz, P. (2023) 'What Makes People Abroad Satisfied? The Role of Cultural Intelligence, Cultural Identity, and Culture Shock', Social Sciences, 12(3), pp. 1-19 
• Marx, E. (2011) Breaking Through Culture Shock: What you need to succeedin international business. New edn. London: John Murray Business.
• Pollock, D.C., Van Reken, R.&. and E (2009) Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds. Revised edn. London, UK: Nicholas Brearley.